Shingetsutan Tsukihime, winner of the coveted "Obsession of the Moment" award.

I give it a full eight Tin Sugar Cubes (that's of a possible eight, for those of you who are wondering).

I like it.

It makes me happy when I'm sad, which is pretty wrong, since it's a very dark and gritty story.

I find it somehow vindicating.

I don't know why. But after spending most of the day depressed, it cheered me up. A fact for which I am vastly grateful.

I could put content in this post, instead of just nattering on that I liked it and fulfilling my self-imposed requirement to post at least once a day, but I've decided that I should try my best to post meaningful stuff whenever possible, or just a short note that yes, I am still alive.

Also, I have a good excuse. I'm working on Diamonds in the Rough again.

That little spot where all of my fanfics got erased depressed me quite a bit. Now to get back into the groove.

WAGE~!

Today was the Halloween party thrown by Ser and Madame Buffington.

So, I, being my normal lazy and flaky self, whined via phone to get a ride, and ended up getting to their place with my requisite pot-luck offerings. Cheese, crackers, and cupcakes, a 20$ investment.

But hey, the cupcakes were on sale for 5.00, from 16.99, a value I couldn't pass up (apparently, they depreciate in value by 60% for being sold on the day after Halloween.

So, we get back to the place where the party is before the party starts, and it comes to light that pretty much no one is really ready for the party, and things need to be done. Cooking, decorating, etc.

I offer to help out with the cooking because I don't feel like decorating. Mistake on my part, as I ruined the deviled eggs.

Anyway. About this time, while I was puzzling out how to salvage ruining what I had offered to do to help, someone tells me in a condescending, "You can't do anything right," tone, that she'll do it, since it was obviously her idea to bring deviled eggs first.

Let me make something clear about this; this person is, in reality, quite probably my least favorite person in all reality. That probably means very little, because I make it a point not to dislike people whenever possible. Regardless.

She is the reason why I don't like furries. She emobodies every value of the 'bad' furry to exist, from the annoyingly shrill voice to the constant references to 'paws' and 'litter boxes' (since 'hands' or 'washrooms' are apparently unpronouncable to her). She is the most attention-whorish person I have ever had the misfortune to meet. She feeds off attention, and she doesn't seem to like me because I don't care. She is so self centered I hate myself just for being near her.

So I left the party.

Woohoo.

I was really looking forward to hanging out with friends, but I'm going to have to ask this now.

No offense, guys, but if Rose is invited to an event, don't offer to include me.

My options will be to either grow increasingly bitter by having to be near her, or decline as politely as possible. This is no snap judgement; I've disliked the way she's acted every time I've seen her. If she's a deeper person than the insipidly shallow persona she's demonstrated to me, she should really consider not acting the way she does.

This is not me saying that you should pick one of us to be friends with, this is me saying, as a friend, respect the fact that I don't want to be around her. I have no problem with being involved with you guys or doing things.

As long as she isn't there.

Ugh.

Well, my day is pretty much shot, now. Spent most of the morning getting psyched up for the party, and then couldn't go because someone annoyed me too much.

So, a quick message to all furries out there: I personally challenge you to be better people than her. I can't imagine it's hard. I don't personally know a single furry who bothers me at all, let alone as much as she does. But whenever I see or read internet discussions about 'bad' furries, she immediately comes to mind.

Now. I'm going to try and do something useful with my day.

No bets.

Happy Halloween.

And such.

So, I slept in today. That was nice.

Then I went to an interview, and I think it went well, but you never know.

Then I went to visit my parents, and we watched a movie called 'Dreamcatcher'. And let me tell you now -- this is a movie that screams, "I was a brilliant book!"

It was not, however, a brilliant movie.

Some might go so far as to say it was notably un-brilliant.

But it was kind of fun anyway. I mean, I got to visit my parents, and that's something I'm horrible about.

When I was getting ready for my interview, I found my first gray hair today. Actually, it's not gray. It's white. I wonder if I have a tiny scar on my head that caused it, or if it's normal for people my age to get a single white hair or two, or ... maybe it's a supernatural haunted/cursed hair and it presages my death.

I don't know.

I also know that my lack of knowledge makes me unhappy. I desire to be more knowledgeable, and in a true enough sense, my desire is the root of my discontent. I want many things I expect I can't have outside of my dreams or perhaps some distant afterlife.

As I learn more of the Tao, I think it begins to say that knowing less, and not desiring to know more is the secret to being happy. But that saddens me, because even if 'ignorance is bliss', I don't think I'd want to not know anything. I know there's a balance, but I don't know how to find it. I think I'm drawing closer, but I'm no longer assured of this. Perhaps I will meditate tonight and ponder this.

Or perhaps I'll just sleep, learn not to worry, and everything will work out.

Another subject change. I notice that people tend to become more philosophical or willing to turn to religion when in dire straights. Is it that they no longer believe that they truly have the potential within themselves to overcome their hardships, and that they want to try and find a convenient excuse to be strong enough to withstand their trials and tribulations? For Christianity, at least, while they may claim that their faith protects them, they also say, "God helps those who help themselves."

I think often people who say that their faith in religion makes them stronger are just saying that because it's easier and more acceptable to them than saying, "I'm strong enough to forge my own destiny." Maybe it's a fear that cows them into conforming, and maybe, if that's the case, it's really not strength; it's accepting one weakness in exchange for another.

Maybe, I'm getting way too freaking convoluted in my little existentialism thoughts, and should really just relax.

And maybe sleep is a good thing.

I think sleep deserves more attention than, "Will I get that job?" or "What drives man to seek religion?" right now.

Peace till tomorrow, when I report how the party went.

Rawr.

I'm now home.

And today only got worse as time went on, amazingly. So, after everything else was said and done, the guy who wanted the reports done finally did them himself.

And it took him only ten minutes to do so. Of course, it helps, when you delegate work, to actually teach the people who you delegate the work to how to access the tools they need.

There's more, but why bother? It all boils down into the same thing.

I'm not really happy at work anymore.

So, this is somewhat handy, being able to update from work.

Which I am doing now, much to your dismay.

That's right. Now you can get regular updates to my annoying behavior. Just wait until the Rez-ly one gives me the promised 'mood' icons.

Muwa-to the-ha-to the-hahaha.

It's somewhat stressful, being the guy who's willing to step up to a task. I'm asked to do an awful lot some days, and it really strains me to do so much. Now, even when I don't step up, they ask me to do everything.

Today, my list of duties was:

1.) Answer the phones, as always.

2.) Update servers with information that enables other people to help take afformentioned calls.

3.) Do multiple reports involving a long and arcane proceedure which I am not at liberty to explain. (Trust me. It takes about an hour per report, and I've got 18 of them.)

4.) Do ADDITIONAL reports covering the entire histories of a few specific titles. (You know, when it takes an hour to do a one week report....)

So I manage to convince my supervisor to share at least one of the duties around. That being the server thingie.

Hooray.

Then it takes me forever struggling with a program that my system is not, ultimately, equipped to handle, to try and GET this information.

Which then locks up said program.

So, I struggle to generate an alternate report using html instead of a word document. And it works!

This requires a bit of editing on my part, but I don't even need notepad -- Composer does it for me in about an hour.

I have a single completed report in about an hour, sans the repair job it will honestly require. Great.

And then I'm told, "Well, don't worry, they changed their minds."

Much dissatisfaction.